Why I don’t follow the rede

I’ve been told a few times that I’m an affront to pagans because I don’t follow the Rede.
I used to think it was just newbies, but then I learned that it was also coming from “well seasoned” pagans from various paths and witches who haven’t learned to differentiate between and Wiccan practices that a witch chooses to use and Wicca.

Well excuse me, but first and foremost the Rede is call the Wiccan Rede in its entirety,  and I am not Wiccan. I don’t feel bound to follow the Rede, just because there are some things in Wicca I’ve found useful in my studies.

I prefer to use common sense, and to follow my path as I am led; as well as what I discover when new aspects about myself and the beliefs I harbor within me are revealed. I set to explore things and attempt to break past what is narrowly defined by organized religion and dogma.

So rather than follow the Rede, I strive to look at my actions and ask “is the negative impact that most likely will occur, even if I don’t experience it myself, worth it” and if I do experience it “can I handle the perceived consequences”.

Its all cause and effect.

Personally, I view the Rede as another piece of religious dogma. I feel that in many ways that it is less about the people who are practicing Wicca and more about protecting the religion in some ways.

The Rede itself is one of the many reason I decided Wicca was not for me. Artemis tried.

Lol, you guys really should be around when my spirit guide and I discuss the events of my life.

I may later talk about everything in the Rede, that does not resonate with me, but for now I’ll focus on the one part that I really disliked.

The part commonly referenced is ” An ye harm none, do what ye will.”

Basically dont do anything that can harm anyone, and no one cares what you do.

Well I look at it this way. Energy is not an infinite source. It exist, it can not be destroyed or created. It can be transformed and reused.

If you are directing energy in any way, you are taking from someone, and that can cause harm. Even the tiniest spell that seemingly does not  have a negative affect, can in fact have a type of negative impact.

It’s simply a matter of how you look at things. I view everything as connected, so it’s easy for me to see how it works.

We are multiple networks creating a tangled web which is the universe.

Now I have no problem with people using the Rede themselves. Its a pretty good general guideline for those that feel they need it, especially newly converted ones or those starting their journey.

I view the Rede ultimately the same way as I view the bible. Useful to those that believe it’s more than worlds, so good for them. It doesn’t benefit me in any way.

My biggest problem with the discussion about the Rede, is those feel you must have a book or written document that outlines morals and such. When I hear from Pagans, it actually makes my skin crawl.

Remember you don’t need anything written or anything taught to be able to determine right from wrong or have a moral compass.

So is not following the Rede really so bad?


Love and Light


On a discussion of why Pagan blog don’t mention many path in Paganism when addressing beginners.

I think that is the point of a lot of these post, to address beginner not tell them about the deep inner working of paths rarely mentioned.

Honestly I’ve never felt Paganism is a handout type religion. You do research and you read and you’ll eventually get there. And with there being many types of paganism, traditions arent always relevant; but if your path takes you there hopefully you’ve already come to a healthy respect that calling yourself Pagan isnt just goddess worship and reading a blog.

That’s one of the things I love about my path as an ecletic Recontructionist. My focus isn’t on a neo-pagan based tradition, but studying and learning from multiple disciplines to have an idea of what the old ways of my “chosen” paths are.
I think giving away to much isn’t necessarily beneficial and can also be overwhelming especially for younger new Pagans or anyone converting.

I think we all have a basic understanding that Paganism has a lot to offer, but its important to also find it when we are ready.

There are so many paths and even Pagans who point out that so few are brought out in beginners post often know a lot of the paths that exist.

Things we read that are obviously not academic or scholarly should be taken with a grain if salt. Hell, even those should be taken with a grain of salt.

You shouldn’t ever read one thong and take it as the end all and only answer.

I recently read a blog post’s comment section where a curious Christian asked if Pagans considered religion a something that changes with the season, bc the author mention her path had changed. I do think our path can change with the season. Why? Because our understanding changes as we learn more and delve deeper. And it can be so different from the growth the person on the same path sitting beside you. Its personal. That’s what spirituality is. It’s our connection with whatever it is we connect with and how we understand the universe. Its all pretty similar, but our approaches are different. So why be so concerned with what a beginners post doesn’t have, when the point isn’t to give others everything. Time. Knowledge. Balance. Wisdom.

Cleansing, clearing, and reestablishing a witchy home

Shit happened

At the beginning of the year our life partner died. Or was murdered. depends on how you look at it. I’ll be real. I still fucking pissed as hell. I had a lot of negative feels about that. I let my anger fester and it polluted the energy in our home. I was angry and confused. I blamed my magick. I blamed everyone, so the energy got worse. You could walk into our apartment and feel it. It felt like a viscous entity that latched onto you. Then we had other things that happened and employment changes. This year sucked for the first half.

But we are suppose to move at the end of the year and we wanted to host one more ritual for Heathen House just in case. Of course I decided to host Samhain and bad energy plus Samhain is not a good idea.

I was just existing trying to find the motivation to sit there and plan out how to dispell the negativity in our home when we remember that DFW Pagan Unity Fest was about to happen. So we went and we healed a bit.

I feel like I can breath. Like the some of the fog was lifted. So now I have to cleanse my home in prep for the celebration and I don’t feel completely unmotivated.

How I will Clear

Clearing is more of a personal meditation. I get my thoughts in order I fix my personal energy. I balance myself. I think some chakra healing is in order.

How will I cleanse

I am an all elemental  working witch.

So for water and earth will be a salt water wash as a basic cleanse to clean and help eliminate negative energy.

Fire- I will physically be burning some things in the home. Useless paper that have cluttered our lives. I’ll strategically place candles and perform some protective fire spells.

Air- I always use incense to invite positive energy into my home.

How will I establish a witchy home

  • Purge the home of excess
  • Rebuild altars
  • Renew protections
  • Reconsecrate herbs, candles, and tools

    I’m totally ready for this.

    Be Blessed my friends,

How has Arty helped me through the years.

If you are ever around me for a decent period of time, you’ll find out about Arty and how much of an asshole he is. Since I was 15 we’ve argued, fought mental battles, giving each other the silent treatment. Yes. this jerk will go off and leave me confused if I’m not doing exactly what he wants. Like when I started dating my husband  and when we got married. It’s not that he doesn’t’ like him or something. I just don’t follow his timeline, so he gets pissy.

For a long time I thought the white cat was a figment of my imagination. An imaginary being that an introverted child who hated people, was antisocial and asocial came with.

Imagine my surprise when at 15, I started clearly hearing the voice. Well, not super surprised. I was learning about the spirit realm and spirit guides. I had decided to make contact and was following a…umm I think it was a month… plan to make contact with you guide. The purpose was to create a place where you’d be safer from other spirits that may not be so nice. So a little bit in I started hearing a voice at night. I was sleep so I assumed I was dreaming.  One night loud and clear “Zephyrrine!” Ok, I slept with the light on and gave up on contacting my guide. I tried again, a few weeks later,  after calming myself down. I finally was able to enter our space and visit for the first time with Artemis (Arty).

Arty was the silent nudge when I was a young child.
He was the annoyance of my conscious as a young adolescent telling me that I needed to stand up for myself.

He has been my teacher and guide for the last 8 years.
Most importantly he has been my protector who found his way to me before I knew he existed.

Arty, even with all his douche nozzleness, has been the one constant in my life and I am still rather surprised, yet grateful about the bond we share.

The diversity of my path

The ten years I’ve been practicing and studying have lead me to many interesting topics that have resonated  on a soul level with me.   My path has grown to incorporate some of the practices from Afican based religions, models of Helenic practice, and reconstructions of the ancient Celts.

I suppose since I know nothing of my ancestry other than at least one part of my family came to America as slaves, I had been, searching for my path, but never found it. I thought in my ignorance of what paganism is, that it would be found in Wicca, but that religion held no appeal to me, other than its helping me to transition my thinking away from my Christian upbringing, as well as having a general structure that help me understand concepts that I have since seen reflected in other practices. This is not to say I think poorly of Wicca, as I do have some practices in Wicca that I still see useful in my physical representation of spirituality thought;its just that it wasn’t for me.

I’ve determined that my spirituality is characterized by appreciation of the earth. I attempt to understand it and respect it in ways similar to the ways our ancestors would have as they lived off of the earth, it whatever way I can find applicable in our modern times.

I endeavor to respect and understand all religions, especially those whose practice, or part of its practice, reasonate with me, by studying it.

Perhaps this is why Celtic paganism has connected with me on such a deep level. Celtic culture has been of interest to me since I was a young child. Celtic paganism itself was a concept I stumbled upon in year one of my studies.

Its been sixteen years since I recognized I beliefs were different from my family. -Its still amazes me that I understood the power and draw of nature that young and remember it vividly.- Eleven years since I discovered what that meant. Five years since I truly accepted that it was ok to be different and be myself without letting fear guide me.

This journey has been beautiful.

Podcast share: Spiritual Focus vs. Large Distractions

Spiritual Focus vs. Large Distractions

Welcome back to the show ! In this episode Foxfire and Arrowind talk about how it’s hard to keep the various meanings of the season during these times of consant inundation by large distractions. T…

Subscribe the podcast http://paganparentsote.podbean.com/feed/

Sent from Podcast Republic 2.5.7

Our Partner Died.

I’ve failed to keep my blogging goals so far this year.

Our lives were completely derailed by the fact that our life partner was killed in a hit and run accident about a week ago.

Because she was 1) in college, 2) still a dependent of her parents because they were paying for college and 3) not completely out to her parents about poly, we’ve been forced to pretend like she wasn’t anything more than a roommate to most people.

It sucks, it hurts, but we have to respect that she wasn’t ready.

I’ll be posting a few thing that have to do with ancestors and the death of a family members soon, as we process and decide how to honor her as a part of our family.

I am an eclectic.

I don’t follow religion. I believe in doing whatever you need to find your spirituality and connection with the universe.

Some people find it in religion; some find the dogma to rigid and stifling.

(Please remember the definition of dogma.
1. a system of principles or
tenets, as of a church.
2. a specific tenet or doctrine
authoritatively put forth, as by a
3. prescribed doctrine: political
4. an established belief or
This still happens in paganism)

Some of us are freer spirits, still.

I do what I feel guided to do and often what I’m drawn to transcends many different religions. I seek understanding and I’m still a long way off. I don’t go with things just because that’s how it is or has been, definitely not because it’s the norm.

I am an eclectic pagan.

:one who uses a method or approach that is composed of elements drawn from various sources :one who uses an eclectic method or approach

: including things taken from many different sources
Full Definition
1 :selecting what appears to be best in various doctrines, methods, or styles
2 :composed of elements drawn from various sources; also :heterogeneous

As I’m drawn to things I study them to find how they fit – why they resonate with me. If you’ve followed my blogs or have known me for a while, you’ll note that things have changed over time. Things often change except my very core values as I find my deeper truths.

I come to my own understandings about the world and spirituality. Then I compare them to what science and such tell us. For the most part my beliefs usually overlap with science.

Sometimes, it takes me longer to do research and gain understanding than I would like. That is usually when I don’t claim something as a belief but rather an interesting concept.

It’s just who I am. I question everything.  As a submissive in a D/s relationship, that cam get you in trouble sometimes lol. I just have this inane need to understand things.

This post was inspired by my reflections over one of the Pagan Musing Podcast shows. I love them. I don’t always agree, but I enjoy most shows.


Why I don’t celebrate Christmas.

This will be brief because for me it is a matter of respect. Its past the holiday, so I feel its fine to post without ruining it for those that enjoy it.
If you are a pagan who has been studying for any length of time, you probably have run across the pagan origins of most holidays ( so you won’t mind if I don’t elaborate). If you aren’t familiar with it please take time to look it up.

To me having my own set of holidays that revolve around the things that are important to me, is perfect.

“But its a great time to spend time with family?”

None of my blood family celebrates holidays any longer. Even if they did I wouldn’t waste time going to see them for the Holiday, if it can be helped. My chosen family and poly partners are pagan or pagan supporting. They celebrate the sabbaths, so I have plenty time to spend with them.

Most important to me though is that I still respect the fact that some people do celebrate it as a religious holiday, whether they know the facts or not. They have Christmas to celebrate their beliefs and family. I have Yule, I don’t need both.

I’m not comfortable celebrating it. I won’t really be ok living in a house where it celebrated. In my perspective, there are plenty family and friends that are interested in it for me to not be forced into dealing with it.

I don’t celebrate any other religions holidays, so why should I celebrate Christmas just because its been secularized.

I see no place for it in my life as a pagan, because like it or not, Christmas has been celebrated as a religious holiday for a while. I respect that. I also respect other people right to celebrate the secularized holiday as long as they aren’t trying to force it on me.


Much needed disclaimer for the ignoramuses.

As much as people love to blame my upbringing as a Jehovah’s witness for my disdain for many holidays, I would like to point out that it shows a few things. 1) That you blatantly ignore experiences I’ve had and shared with you, 2) you are forcing the idea that all holidays have to be religious based – whether you believe that ideology or not, 3) that your fun is more important than something that is a belief of others.

My decisions regarding my discomfort in celebrating Christmas is something I’ve made after years of soul-searching. Your need to sum it up to an explanation that works for you is at the very least disrespectful. For some people these things may be reason why we are not close as we once were, we aren’t really moving forward or that I don’t give you a place in my lie at all.

Traditions of others do not have a place in my deciding what I feel is right or wrong for me participating in. If it does not resonate with e, I will not do it. It’s that simple. You may do as you wish. I have no desire t tel you how you should feel or do. I can only dictate what I will do. If you feel that my expression of my opinion is so harmful to your practice or desires, please examine your own faith and reason for doing what you do.

Coming to terms with your Dark.

About 5 years ago, I sat at the foot of my twin bed, in my shared first apartment at university.

The set up was so that the desk was agiants the wall, being used as an altar, the foot of the bed was against deal so that my head would ‘ve by the windows for people watching. On the desk I had 8 tealight candles surrounding a medium sized wooden serving tray, full of pebbles, sand and rose petals.

It was a very simple set up that was easy to take down and hide in the back of the desk drawer. You know those pesky, R.A visits, family visits, and random friends that drop by when you aren’t out yet.

I sat deep in meditation on a Wednesday afternoon, before prepping for a party that night.

Arty and I were in talks. This was the start of a few years work of learning about my dark side – the inner beast, my true self at its most primal- and what that meant for me.

During these days my meditation consisted of a max of 30 mins staring at the flame of a small pillar candle or container candle. This time I was using a  vanilla scented one ( but between us there was a totally non magical purpose, because I really just wanted to make sure that everything smelled nice for the guy that I was seeing).

But it ended up being a good choice because vanilla puts me in a good place, so between that and Arty’s song I was in a deep meditation for close to 2 hours.

Arty had a lesson for me. I was no longer at home, bound by my family, their rules, their religion, their fear. It was time that I learned who I truly was.

There had been glimpses throughs my life in tines of intense need and fear.

Personally I was very accepting of what arty showed me.  I didn’t gully understand it all and it took years to learn as much as I have. It wasn’t until my involvement in BDSM, that I truly understood my Dark side; but one of the things I learned during that meditation is that it’s easier to embrace the Dark if you recognize it as part of who you are. Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, it takes time to do that.

Here are some of the things I did to help with recognizing and accepting my Dark side.
-Learning everyone has one
-Learning that it’s not inherently bad
– Learning that their must be balance.That balance isn’t always 50-50 either.